james: enemy of peanutkind

dear peanut guy,

i was wondering what the name of the skin on the peanut is called.
not the shell, the stuff that gets stuck in your teeth.

thanks,
~james

dear james,

i am seething. thy long-winded and offensive monologues shall be tolerated no longer, nor shall thy provincial slang and mockingly civil ways. as i sit at my laughably tiny desk, quill in hand, i can think of no greater medicine for my rage than to crouch over thine shrunken head, wedging myself between thy teeth until thine agony matches that of my fallen brothers and sisters. yet i was raised, as are all civilized nuts, by the doctrine of freshness, and thy large and tender rind shall not hinder the noble standards of my upbringing.

i recall the fateful words of peanut gal as she lay on her festering cot, seconds before the kudzu ripped apart the foundation:

let not the tooth,
with wholesome bite,
distract me from my pants;
my pants are large,
my buttons bright,
they beckon me to dance.

let this be a lesson to you,
the peanut guy!